Christmas

Wow. What an amazing Christmas weekend I had!! We had 4 members of Carmichael's family stay at our home from Fri evening to Mon afternoon & it was a blast!! It also made me so thankful for the type of man my guy is. I don't mean offense to his brothers, just that they definitely aren't the peanut butter to my jelly. Lol. Loved having his brothers gf & daughter her. Meah seems so nice, grounded & classy. I'd really like to get closer to her & get to know her better. & miss Ma'Leah is TOO cute!!! I just love that little girl to pieces really!!

Christmas Day was pure craziness for me!! We got up at 8, opened presents & then I got to cooking. 5 hrs later I had whipped up a full Christmas meal for 16 people & the food was AMAZING!! We had turkey, ham, mashed potatoes, sweet potatoes, white velveeta mac & chz, stuffing, green bean casserole, turkey gravy, cranberry sauce, deviled eggs, homemade rolls, homemade cinnamon rolls, pumpkin pie, cheesecake & apple pie ala mode!! The dinner was so good that nobody even moved onto dessert til the next day & the only thing to put away was meat. Everything else had been eaten up & not because there wasn't enough! Lol. I take that as a compliment :)

Present wise was great too. Our first Christmas to celebrate together & Carmichael & I did great with each others gifts. He got me 2 pairs of Sperry's that I would have NEVER allowed myself to fork over the cash for & I got him a much wanted Xbox game & Xbox live membership plus some pajamas & I still have a present coming for him that is very personal to him & handmade ;) I'm super stoked about it!

The kids got clothes, shoes, toys, games & all sorts of goodies!! I have to say I was having so much fun & was so busy that the last thing on my mind was taking pictures so I barely have any but I'm ok with that. It's not often I'm that caught up in the moment!

I loved having both of our families together for Christmas & I look forward to the next time!! Hope y'all had a great Christmas too!

Apparently....

I live with the sun. Cause he sure expects us to revolve around him without him doing the same. Sheesh. I need to go to bed.

Love.

I can't quote scripture. & trying to read the Bible intimidates me & sometimes overwhelms me. Am I a "bad Christian"? Nope. I still absorb the message. I still know what's expected of me.

So we come to L-O-V-E. I am trying to live this. I have prayed to let go of the past. Not only forgive those who have wronged me, or that I instinctually don't like, but to put LOVE in my heart for them. Genuine love. At first I only prayed to not dislike/hate them. I told myself that it was ok to forgive but that didn't mean I had to like them. But that's not gonna cut it. Like I said, I can't quote scripture, but I know what the Bible says. It says love is the greatest of all the commands, demands & expectations of our Father.

Sometimes it's my love for another that fuels it. My love for my future step-son pushes me to pray for love for his mother, who seems to be wandering right now, with no clear direction. If I can manage to bridge that gap from negative to positive feelings for his mother & her family, it not only serves this little boy that I love as my own but it honors him & God. It shows him that what he needs is more important to me than how I feel towards his mother. This I feel is a big part of love....caring more for what the other person needs from you than whet you need from them. If everybody thought that way then love would be easier.

There has been an issue very heavy on my heart lately. It's been pressing at me for years honestly, but I just ignore it. Please don't ask what it is or assume its about you. At this point it's between me & God until He helps me see what to do. At the heart of this issue is Gods command to love. When there is hate in the heart like there is in this situation, it puts up a wall between you & God. The Bible clearly states that if you do not love your fellow man then you do not love Him. This hits me hard. So I pray for it. I want to honor God. It may take time & a lot of work to get there but it is always a work in progress to be more like Jesus. & I want to keep striving.

I feel like I'm rambling & jumping around so I'll end with this....

LOVE EVERYBODY. Love the ones who have hurt you, who are lost, who are broken. Extend your hand & open your heart. Don't focus on society, make it about God. Do the right thing. Hate will lead to distance between you & God & that leads to no eternal life with our God. To love without restriction, regardless of situation is to be more like Jesus. Jesus is the only way to God so the more you love, the closer you are.

Hey Guess What?!?!

GOD IS GREAT!!!

Man, I have really felt like testifying lately.

You wouldn't believe the amazing things happening here!!

God has put on this home more blessings than we know what to do with!

It's CRAZY.

Some BIG changes are coming (positive).

& I'm thrilled to see what comes from us listening to God.

Obedience is changing our lives!!

(I feel like the queen of exclamation points)

Lol.

But I'm EXCITED!!!!

I finally answered being called to be part of Aviatior Kids.

So, now I'm an official "little" leader in our church! :)

Who woulda thunk that a year ago?  Not me!

Tonight was the pre-launch for Aviator Students & I got to see my guy perform again.

He was great...as usual of course.  ;)

It was fantastic.  I see why the kids respond to Zak (youth pastor) now!

Had to bail early cause of tired little ones though.

Still enjoyed it immensely.

Yesterday was TreaVon's 4th b-day party & it was great!!

What a joy he is to have around.

It was so much fun to see him so excited for the party.

His mom, g-ma, aunt & cousin got to come & he was stoked!

It was a little awkward but no biggie.

I can handle awkward to make my little guy happy.  :)

We were gonna buy a fantastic cake but that plan got booted at the last minute so I made one.

It was decent & he liked it so that's what matters.

(Even though I REALLY wanted that awesome cake!)

Lol.

Ashyra & TreaVon at his party :)

Other news is that my guy has been reading his Bible app at work.

& I think that's great.

God is so in his heart & it's amazing to watch.

I feel it might be a long road until complete submission but, wow....

He's already done so much in him.

& it's drawing me even closer to BOTH of them b/c of it.

Even though we go through our trials, I feel a firm grip on us to be together.

I feel it's more than me.

The more I pray, the more that seems to be the answer I get.

The more I let go, the more positive I see.

It truly blows me away.

I wish I could shout of His love from a mountain.

I would.

I wish I could just have a mic & talk to a crowd about Him.

I would. 

(after a few encouraging shoves) ;)

I wish everybody knew the love & peace of loving Him!!

Of obeying Him!

Of asking Him to work through them!!!

So this is my forum.

My blog.

My facebook.

My instagram.

& now, my path.

I won't shut up now.  

Just try to stop me. ;)

Yay!!

Thanks to my sisters good friend Tara (& my new friend) I was able to update my iTunes stuff so I could get this app!!! She totally rocks!!!

My Confession

I'm not perfect.

Calm down.  I know it's shocking.

But it's true!

Now, let's get serious.

When I started taking my relationship with God seriously....

I changed.

& so did most of my relationships.

Some ended, others got stronger, but things were definitely different.

I think some folks expected I'd open my heart to Him & then....

just stay the same.

But wait, that makes NO sense at all!!

Why would I do that?!?!

Giving my heart to my children changed me.

Giving my heart to my man changed me.

So why wouldn't giving my heart & LIFE to my Creator change me?

If I stay the same then did I REALLY open my heart?

The answer is no.

You can believe in God all you want.

That won't get you to heaven.

*GASP!*

It's true.  Think about it.

Even SATAN believes in God & he's not steeping foot past the pearly gates.

You have to do more than believe.

You can't get something, no...EVERYTHING for nothing!!!

You can't have eternal life (in Heaven) after you die if you don't surrender yourself to Him.

It doesn't work like that.

Sorry.

My house has been turned upside down by Jesus lately.  

There have been baptisms.

3 have been called to do work for our church.

Children have been dedicated.

Relationships have been fixed.

Forgiveness has run rampant.

Blessings are given daily.

Everything is CHANGING!!!

Even financially.

It's no secret we're a young, large & sometimes struggling family.

But we still decided to start tithing.

& I can't lie.

It scares me.

Last check the tithe would have been almost $100.

That's a lot...to me.

But we're supposed to rely on God to provide where we fall short right?

To trust Him?

Have faith?

Well that was really hard. 

We tithed $40.

Ugh.

It's not that we didn't WANT to tithe the whole $94.

We just failed at resisting the fears of our extremely tight budget.

& let me tell you....

the guilt of it was NOT worth it.

We will do better next time.

We will trust.

We will have faith.

We will f.r.o.G.

I love that the little kids compete over who gets to pray over our meals.

I love that I've seen my guy on his knees praying.

I love that leaders in the church know our names.

& our kids names.

& are drawn to call us to serve the Lord by volunteering for our church.

I love all of that.

But mostly....

I love my God.

Jesus saved me 10 years ago.

[Thank God]

But now that I'm actually walking with Him,

Everything has changed.

Without changing at all.

& I don't miss the "old" me.

Not even a little.

& I'm sure nobody else does either.

[cept 1 person that doesn't understand]

The old me SUCKED.

THIS me is awesome.

Not perfect.

But awesome.

& I praise Him for the awesome in me.

I praise him through my storms.

Then I thank Him for the sunshine & rainbow that follows.

God is good.

An Affair Of The Heart.

I am in love.

With more than one person.

Let's do the roll call....

The most important of them all is God.

Even though I am not perfect & I still commit sins...

He loves me.

He listens to me.

He gave His son for me.

& I'm going to tell the world!

Next in line is my guy.

Look at him.

He has brought so much love to my life.

& I will never be able to thank him adequately.

I've been in love before.

But never like this.

He has literally made me more into the woman I want to be.

He encourages me.

He compliments me.

He thinks more of me than I do myself.

He's my love muffin.

Next up is the reason I was first called mama.

This girl has THE most amazing personality.

She's also very smart.

Obviously beautiful.

& talented at a HUGE array of things.

She is the all-American girl.

& the apple of my eye.

If I get any prouder I just might burst.

Moving on down the line we come to my youngest daughter.

Just how does THAT MUCH cute fit into that little body?!

She is such a doll.

The most helpful child in the house.

She is definitely my "mini-me" when it comes to being a mama.

& has leader written all over her.

I simply cannot get enough of this cuddle-bug.

My pride & joy I tell ya.

I can't wait to see the little lady she becomes.

Next is someone new to my heart, but just as loved.

I know he's technically not mine.

But I don't see it that way.

I will never try to take the place of his mama.

But I also won't NOT be the best step-mama I can be for him.

He is sunshine in little man form.

Everyday he makes me laugh.

Everyday he surprises me with his intelligence.

This is my boy.

Maybe not through blood.

But definitely through love.

& last, but not least...we come to the latest addition to our home.

Oh. My. Gosh.

If you don't love him on sight...

You are cold-hearted.

He is the happiest baby ever.

With a smile so big, it looks like his face would hurt from it.

You can't help but smile back of course.

& then kiss his face all over.

& pinch his cheeks.

& give him a big, squeezing hug.

Just thinking about him makes me wanna go smooch him.

Actually...I'm going to.  :)

Give the glory to God in all things good & bad.

Kiss your spouse as much as possible.

Hug your kids constantly.

Forgive quickly.

Pray often.